Not to get all high and mighty but...

Everyone has ruined having a journal for me. When I say everyone, I mean people whose journals I hate reading and make me feel like I'm wasting my breath (so to speak) on a brain dead audience. I don't mean everybody. I mean some people. I'd like to just come out and say that the following will be a whole mess of contradictions and hypocrisy. But it's something I feel I have to write.

I've always been the keeper of a journal, whether it be on a computer screen or on paper. This LiveJournal works for me in many ways. One is the convenience (when the site is up and running) of having somewhere to place my thoughts. Another is having people read my thoughts, something that I like to have done. Another is having comments as to what people think of my thoughts. Another is coming into contact with people who share my thoughts.

However, this has become a fad. Something that I used to hold sacred is now just becoming something I masturbate with. This champagne has turned into Keystone Ice.

I first heard of LJ by reading bryan sawyer's in Nick's room last year. At that time, I'm not sure if you remember or care or care to remember, I was keeping a psuedo journal in my buddy info of AIM. This was inconvenient, as I had to deleted past 'entries' when I wanted to write new ones. So I started my journal here. Boy was I excited. It was new and exciting and very very cathartic.

Then, one by one, it started to catch. My friends started getting their own journals. Yes, LiveJournal is a public resource that can be accessed by anyone. But I felt as if someone was stealing the spotlight. Many people were stealing it.

Now, I'm afraid it has become a competition of sorts. There are feuds, some serious, some just for fun, between people with journals. There are entries from others that I love reading and entries which infuriate me. There are people who I'm glad have journals and people who I think don't have thoughts worthy of being read.

I'm being such an asshole now.

God, I want to write so much more about how unhappy with the way things have become for LiveJournal. I want to name names and point out shortcomings. As if what I have already written won't spark enough hatred for me. As if my journal is any better than anyone else's.

Well it is, and here's why:

I had not high hopes for tonight, but decent hopes. I was intent upon drinking because I hadn't done so in a while and I was in a lot of pain physically. My shin still hurts from when Seth jumped off the seesaw right as I was going to catapult him at Baldwin Park. More than that, I just wanted to relax.

Well it's hard to relax when you're stuck alone in a suite with your own thoughts.

I'm waiting for a punchline here. There is none. Tonight was a big joke that went nowhere. If you're still reading this, sorry to disappoint you.

We tried to get Bob to smear shaving cream all over his face tonight. The old cream in one hand, feather to the nose. He only dabbed himself a few times, nothing major.

I remember when I was at Bill's house after school or during lunch break or something and he said "Hmmm, what can I eat to make me fatter?" I'm always wondering that same thought.

I haven't had Wonder Bread in a while. I wonder how it is. Josh is right when he says (and I paraphrase) "I need a girl." I wish I hadn't wasted mine and everyone else's time with this. It's 4:30 am, I have to sleep.

Excuse me for keepin' it real

Who said one man can't make a difference? I single-handedly got Tim to stop updating his journal. Don't all thank me at once.

I downloaded a whole lot of the Buena Vista Social Club. They're so Latin in hurts me to listen. Hurts in a good way. Ay, que lastimo! Makes me want to samba. It puts the lotion in the basket. It really does.

I'm going to look at an apartment on Wadsworth St. at 5:30. Until then, I'm going to sit here and do nothing blah. I'm going to skateboard down to my car, it's all the way down there. I can't wait. Before break, I was just fooling around with Bob's board. I can still ollie. That's standing still though. I don't think I can do it moving anymore. It'll all come back I'm sure.

Tim's Retirement

Do you think Tim's really leaving? Yes No Hopefully It's just another cry for attention, he'll be back Current Results

Maria, cepille sus dientes con Gleem!

Chihuahua! I put a $360 deposit on an apartment at 22 Wadsworth. I'm going to be living in that shitty one bedroom for a year. I don't think I'm going to do laundry ever next year. I don't even do it this year and it's free and right down the hall. I don't think I'm going to get cable either. I wonder if you can just get one porn channel and that's it. That's all a sick pervert like me needs.

The girl who lives there now was in the apartment when I looked at it. She was a fox. I forgot to ask about furnishings. I'm probably going to have to get a bed. Man, that shit sucks. I'll just sleep on the floor. Or maybe I'll install a Murphy bed. I'll do it myself.

There's ample parking all over the place. Holy shitballs! It's snowing out. Talk about a strange turn of events. Today, as I skateboarded down to my car, I went fast as balls down this hill and I had to bail out. I didn't tuck and roll or anything, but it would have come down to that if I waited anylonger. I pinched a nerve in my back or something just from that brief ride. It hurts like el motherfucker. I recommend Buena Vista Social Club for anyone who needs a little bit of Spanish in them. Last time I had Spanish in me was over the summer two years ago. I fucked my landscapers one by one. It was enough to make my head spin. Eight times.

Si senor.